no train to china

i'll never give up my history
to assimilate into a culture
that has forgotten its name
a culture whose web
of videos
tries to sell back family history
that was lost
because it was more convenient
not to have to carry ID.
the stories of my people
involve telling white people
with white tongues
how to fill out white papers.
a white stamp on our head
tax certificate: a white lie.
the least wanted:
the most documented
and white i white my story,
50, 100, 150 years later
white letters turn brown
in well-whited archives
listed addresses in the white pages
never white delivered
to village homes
in red china.

grandfather's secrets murmur
beneath white
blankets on gold mountain,
under a fresh layer of
white noise.

This poem was inspired by the ACCESS community television broadcast series Uncovering Gold, which discusses Chinese-Canadian migration through a multimedia format. Part 1 can be found here:

upon us all

i look across this life
under the glowing memory
of days gone by

hanging like a setting horizon upon
an endless turning sea,
austere aquamarines

a kite string
	  slightly slipping ajar
                 from  fingers

gone in the wind unto
an endless burning sky,
orange-crimson nylon dye


like smoke rings
always carried
in the breeze,
hanging like sacred smudge

auspicious tiny swirls
hang on the frayed ends of my clothes, little hooks


pictures of a special uncle


soft white coals of

I am a Human: Being

I am so thankful to be free. Free from the confines of limiting doctrine, free from limiting relationships, and free from slavery. Freedom arises not from external circumstance, but from internal desire and yearning.

Really, life is a chessboard and everybody is a Pawn or a Queen. In you is the potential to become (for the inner you is always in a state of becoming), and the freedom to move to wherever you desire: you are autonomous.

Being autonomous, imagine that you are in a deserted salt flat of anywhere. Society is a bunch of footprints leading in one direction. Where does it lead to? Oasis? Mirage? You, in this situation, are free to follow it or not. You can choose to be a part of the path, or you may decide to walk elsewhere. With 360 degrees of direction, you can choose one. If you walk against the path, your perception may imply that you are going backwards, but in an infinity of choices, choosing your direction means you choose to move forwards – if even counter to the direction of society. A step anywhere is a step forward.